DreamState LV
I guess it’s important to start before the beginning.
Back in our younger years, Eli and I only listened to Dubstep at raves. It was all we knew. Approaching 30, my tastes have shifted. Dubstep is now more nostalgia than necessity, except for the occasional new Melodic Dubstep. These days, Trance is everything. The end all, be all.
When Eli and I reconnected, it was because of Gareth Emery. More specifically, Sansa—the song, not the child. From the first listen, it played in my head like a movie. One of those moments where the protagonist finally realizes the answer has been in front of them all along. “It’s you. It’s always been you.” The sequence where someone leaves a wedding before the vows, sprints through an airport to stop the love of their life, and risks everything for a once-in-a-lifetime kind of love. Sometimes, songs with Eli feel like prophecy.
Gareth Emery led us to Dreamstate SoCal. Dreamstate SoCal led us to Dreamstate Las Vegas—the perfect warm-up before the festival. Tonight, it's just us and Trance. The music that connects us. The music that might explain everything.
Orjan Nilsen takes the stage. Slowly, like a warm embrace, Sun & Moon starts to mix in. The moment feels stripped down, intimate.
I smirk and pull Eli into a dance. “Fun coincidence,” I say.
"It's raining, it's pouring
A black sky is falling
It's cold tonight"
I stop, letting the words sink in. And suddenly, I’m not here anymore.
I’m back in 2016. Back under a pink-lit sky, lost in a sea of flags and smoke. I can still see the look in his eyes.
I turn to Eli now. His eyes are the same.
"You gave me your answer
Goodbye
Now I'm all on my own tonight"
Fast-forward. Night three of EDC 2016—the longest night of my life. Bad luck. Worse decisions. The beginning of the end. My heart tightens.
"And when the big wheel starts to spin
You can never know the odds
If you don’t play, you'll never win"
I turn away, eyes closed, still in his arms. Saying goodbye nearly broke both of us in different ways. I was too scared to play again. And I lost him—what I thought was forever. I spent years replaying memories, building playlists filled with ghosts, grieving a life I’d never get to live.
"We were in heaven, you and I
When I lay with you and close my eyes
Our fingers touch the sky"
I lean into him, voice barely above the music. “I think everything makes sense, Eli.” The puzzle pieces are falling into place. “I have so much to catch you up on,” I whisper before letting the moment slip back into dance.
"I'm sorry baby
You were the sun and moon to me”
Sun & Moon isn’t just a song. I’m not even sure it’s a prophecy.
I think it’s a curse.
Intertwined, no matter the time, distance, or circumstance. Always orbiting, never colliding. The song never gives an answer—just a truth that lingers. I push the thought aside. Just dance. Just enjoy the moment. Eli doesn’t need to know. Not yet.
"I'll never get over you, you'll never get over me."
We dance the rest of the early night away. Tomorrow, we work. Tomorrow, we rest.
Because whatever awaits us at the festival… we need to be ready.
